Friday, January 20, 2012
down 1lb from Monday.
I know this is not my usual weigh-in day but I am declaring victory now and moving on.
Well, I am here. goal. exactly 13 months to the day from surgery. In all honesty, it is totally surreal. not real. Can I declare goal again when my brain catches up to my body?
The problem is that I am too tight - the fill I got from my doc totally pushed me over the edge. I've lost 4lbs since last Wed. Also, this week was a no workout week - work was beyond crazy! People in my division are spread out all over - I have staffers in Boston, Denver & the Bay Area. So once or twice a year, my boss gathers everyone in Denver for a couple days of face-to-face meetings. Its a good thing & I'm glad we do it but it gets cray-cray with extra meetings. All week I've been in day-long meetings plus executive dinners & drinks every night. With this fill I've been struggling to get to 1000 calories when I think I should be closer to 1500 now that I'm heading into maintenance-ville. too tight! Its probably a good thing I couldn't workout this week - I probably would've passed out in kickbox.
Just to illustrate how tight I am let me share this gem of a story....a big part of my role is to work with outside vendors to incorporate their products into ours. Obviously, there is a lot of jockeying for position with the vendors since contracts with my company can be literally be worth tens of millions of dollars. Access to execs & executive relationships are key to successful business. Well, one of our long time vendors wanted to have a meeting with my Sr Engineering VP & they spent $75k in sponsorships in order to secure time on his calendar. That meeting with the vendor CEO & my VP was this week and I was one of a three people invited. Definitely cool for me to be included! The meeting went great & then we adjourned to a very nice restaurant for a posh dinner. Bread is on the table but I pass. Everyone orders appetizers & first course but I pass. I nurse one glass of wine for the entire evening & only drink about half a glass. I know I'm tight so for dinner I order seared scallops. should be safe, right? ah, not so much. I nearly projectile PB'd scallop all over the CEO before grabbing my phone & giving the "oooh, I gotta take this" look & racing for the bathroom. sooooo not good! (even after paying $75k to get this meeting, the other company still had to pick up the dinner tab!)
This is not exactly how I wanted to cross the finish line but here I am.....and I can confidently say....I think the doc was right. This is just a little too far for me. 145 is not a goal for me - its the lower limit. My hubs is starting to get that concerned look in his eyes. He has enough to worry about & I don't want to add to that. When I started I just picked 145lb out of nowhere. I'm proud of myself for being stubborn enough to reach a long-dreamt of goal but I'm even more proud that I can look around at where I am at realize its not quite right.
I did manage to get in to see the nurse this morning so she could do a slight unfill. Hoping that this gets me back to green.
Now I need to do some serious thinking about what maintenance means for me & try to figure out how to flip the switch from "lose" to "hold" any suggestions?