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Friday, January 20, 2012

Goal!!!

today's weigh-in: 145.8lbs
down 1lb from Monday.
I know this is not my usual weigh-in day but I am declaring victory now and moving on.

Well, I am here. goal.  exactly 13 months to the day from surgery.  In all honesty, it is totally surreal.  not real.  Can I declare goal again when my brain catches up to my body?

The problem is that I am too tight - the fill I got from my doc totally pushed me over the edge. I've lost 4lbs since last Wed.  Also, this week was a no workout week - work was beyond crazy!  People in my division are spread out all over - I have staffers in Boston, Denver & the Bay Area.  So once or twice a year, my boss gathers everyone in Denver for a couple days of face-to-face meetings.  Its a good thing & I'm glad we do it but it gets cray-cray with extra meetings.  All week I've been in day-long meetings plus executive dinners & drinks every night.  With this fill I've been struggling to get to 1000 calories when I think I should be closer to 1500 now that I'm heading into maintenance-ville.  too tight! Its probably a good thing I couldn't workout this week - I probably would've passed out in kickbox.

Just to illustrate how tight I am let me share this gem of a story....a big part of my role is to work with outside vendors to incorporate their products into ours.  Obviously, there is a lot of jockeying for position with the vendors since contracts with my company can be literally be worth tens of millions of dollars.  Access to execs & executive relationships are key to successful business.  Well, one of our long time vendors wanted to have a meeting with my Sr Engineering VP & they spent $75k in sponsorships in order to secure time on his calendar.  That meeting with the vendor CEO & my VP was this week and I was one of a three people invited.  Definitely cool for me to be included!  The meeting went great & then we adjourned to a very nice restaurant for a posh dinner.  Bread is on the table but I pass.  Everyone orders appetizers & first course but I pass.  I nurse one glass of wine for the entire evening & only drink about half a glass.  I know I'm tight so for dinner I order seared scallops.  should be safe, right?  ah, not so much.   I nearly projectile PB'd scallop all over the CEO before grabbing my phone & giving the "oooh, I gotta take this" look & racing for the bathroom.  sooooo not good! (even after paying $75k to get this meeting, the other company still had to pick up the dinner tab!)

This is not exactly how I wanted to cross the finish line but here I am.....and I can confidently say....I think the doc was right.  This is just a little too far for me.  145 is not a goal for me - its the lower limit.  My hubs is starting to get that concerned look in his eyes.  He has enough to worry about & I don't want to add to that.  When I started I just picked 145lb out of nowhere.  I'm proud of myself for being stubborn enough to reach a long-dreamt of goal but I'm even more proud that I can look around at where I am at realize its not quite right.

I did manage to get in to see the nurse this morning so she could do a slight unfill.  Hoping that this gets me back to green.

Now I need to do some serious thinking about what maintenance means for me & try to figure out how to flip the switch from "lose" to "hold"  any suggestions?



cheers,
chloe

2 comments:

MandaPanda said...

Congratulations on reaching goal! How amazing you must feel!!

After reading several blogs of those who have reached goal (Good job making it into the club!), it seems a lot of them have a "goal range." This is like a 5 lb range they allow themselves to be in. If they go below, the up the calories a bit. If they go above, they buckle down. Seems like a logical approach to me.

So proud of you!

Ronnie said...

Congratulations on reaching goal, lady! That's so fantastic. :)

Glad you got in for an unfill, proud of you for not just trying to "ride out out" like some do. LOL, that sounded mean to those people. (But you know what I mean, right?)

You're a rockstar!